observation | M i a b i . F i l m s

Consumption

23-09-2008

Consumption is netflixing the entire first season of Battlestar Galactica and converting it to ipod format for your morning commute. Regardless of what David Lynch says.

Consumption is buying a Slingbox so you can place-shift your favorite shows and watch them under your desk at work. When time-shifting isn’t enough.

Consumption is tivoing Mad Men, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and Heroes, but having no time to watch any of them because you just rented Manhattan.

Consumption is knowing what the term broadcatching is.

Consumption is watching the Yankees this year while drinking whiskey.

Consumption is knowing exactly what 1 through 20 are on your Netflix queue.

Consumption is never watching a commercial.

Consumption is using PiP. For the 80′s crowd.

Consumption is having your podcasts stop updating because you are way behind on listening to them. Even the ones you like.

Consumption is going to White Castle.

Consumption is hyper-linking this entire post for your audience’s reading pleasure.

I find the hoopla surrounding this picture a bit strange. ‘Professional’ photographer Jill Greenberg was hired by magazine The Atlantic to shoot a cover with John McCain. At some point during the shoot, she deceptively snapped this picture that literally portrays McCain in a bad light. (horrible pun, I know) ‘Professional’ is in quotes because regardless of your politcal leanings, she should have been acting in a professional manner. Shouldn’t she?

Maybe not. Maybe she is a hero. Maybe politics in an important election such as this are the only reason you’d be able to get away with this. Regardless of how underhanded it is.

I don’t understand the uproar concerning the picture itself. McCain looks scary. So what? Aren’t Presidents supposed to look powerful? I realize that with our present foreign policy situation, the impression throughout the world of the U.S. being a ruthless bully, that something like this could have a negative effect on McCain’s campaign. However, one of the main perceived differences between the two major parties is that Republicans are tough and Democrats are pussies. Could Jill Greenberg actually have done McCain a favor? Is the uproar only a result of how the picture was acquired? Or is it really the effect it may have on some voters minds. Admittedly, I don’t follow politics as closely as the next guy, so tell me I’m missing something.

When asked if the picture might support the Republican contention that the media is in bed with the Democrats, Jill Greenberg was defiant. “Good. I want to stir stuff up, but not to the point where I get audited if he becomes president.” she says. I don’t know Jill. It’s cute and all, but I don’t know if this little picture is going to achieve what you wanted. Unless of course you wanted to get your name in the paper.

http://www.pdnpulse.com/2008/09/how-jill-greenb.html

For the record, this website supports Barack.

Coalesced

By: Greg

17-09-2008

Blog

Yesterday after work I stepped outside after a particularly taxing day and what to my wondering eyes should appear but a large protest right there in front of my office. This thing was huge. It stretched three city blocks and was more organized than anything seen in PCU. It was massive. The most astounding part of this whole thing is that every third person had a rally sign. They were really prepared. This wasn’t your crappy handwritten on oak tag fare either. These were printed on colored poster board, with a nice wooden dowel running down the middle. Good for them. The signs read “Healthcare for Homecare Workers” It seems the people who are helping the disabled and elderly have some serious issues with their healthcare benefits.

There were the professional signs. There was rhythmic chanting. There was a guy on a bullhorn. (Though I couldn’t really make out what he was bull-horning.) There was a non-violent march down 7th Ave.

A sight to behold. And inspiring that so many people used their right to assemble in such a civil and hopefully effective way.

I support Healthcare for Homecare workers. Not just because they were marching outside my front door but because those bastards know how to organize! Oh and I hope they get what they’re looking for.

This image doesn’t do it justice. Multiply it by 10.

Root Canal

By: Greg

15-09-2008

Blog

Today I am getting a root canal. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Since I was a little whippersnapper my father pushed and pushed and pushed good hygiene. He brushes like three times a day. THREE TIMES A DAY! I meet the twice a day quota about 360 times a year. When I do miss a brushing, it’s usually because of some partying I had been doing. There is always a deep sense of guilt when I miss a brushing. My favorite toy is not my guitar or my ipod or my Kermit the Frog doll. It’s my SoniCare toothbrush. Brushing has never been so fun before. I look forward to it. The current nightmare scenario is not because of negligence.

It was explained to me like this. I’m going to paint the picture. At some point in the past, there was some trauma to my front tooth. I really don’t recall anything happening. I haven’t been in a fight since middle school. It’s been even longer since I’ve been in a bumper car. This trauma caused the nerve in that tooth to explode. The discoloration we’re all seeing is the blood from the nerve, lining the inside of the tooth. Yes teeth are somewhat translucent.

For the past year, I’ve noticed this tooth getting darker and darker. I always kind of attributed it to smoking. Since I don’t do that anymore I wanted to see about getting my teeth whitened. Naturally, I went to the Magic Dentist. (That’s really his schtick. Exotic illuuuusions and medieval torture devices line the walls of his office.) I was overdue for a cleaning anyway. During the visit the dark front tooth came up. He says the tooth is dead and explains the bumper car scenario. A root canal will clean it out and restore that sparkle to my smile. Magic Dentist, you sold me.

I bought one of those Crest Whitestrips kits for further whitening power. I’ll be able to see in the dark.

So that’s where I am now. I’m getting a root canal today. It’s so adult.

Jesus, Etc.

By: Greg

11-09-2008

Blog

Since today seems to be more about politics than reflection, here are two campaign pictures that threw me.

Weird

http://www.whoshouldyouvotefor.com

Hindsight is 20/20

By: Greg

08-09-2008

Blog

“Hindsight is 20/20.”

I’ve always liked this saying. Kind of says a lot. It’s a pessimistic way of viewing things. It’s regret. It’s what you could have done in a given situation.

This weekend my sister-in-law convinced me to go to Bed Bath & Beyond with her and my brother. I had some curtain shopping I’d been putting off and Cheryl waved those 20% coupons in my face. It was a pretty easy sell. I figured I’d browse their drapery selection and maybe sniff a few candles while I was at it. (Side note: Did you know Bed Bath & Beyond will except Linens N’ Things coupons!?! Ok, back to my story…) 2 hours later, I walked out of there with a bag of kettle cooked sweet and salty popcorn. And not one step closer to solving the lack of privacy issue in my new apartment.

As we were walking back to the car we were being goofy and one of us must have told the other one of us to “Shut up.” We get to the car and I hear over my shoulder…

“What did you say asshole?”

Thinking nothing of it, I put my bag in the back seat and take my rightful place in shotgun. There is some commotion as Mark and Cheryl get in the car.

“Hey asshole!”

I stand up to look. Across the way is a guy with a baby carriage near the trunk of his car. His wife is fiddling around with their two children in the back seat. He’s apparently talking to me. I say…

“Huh?”

“Did you tell my kid to shut up?”

This guy wants to fight me. I have never seen anyone look this angry with a stroller in their hands. He’s got a fu manchu mustache, jet black hair, and explosions for eyes. He wants to beat me over the head with that thing. I say, in a somewhat snotty tone…

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

And I didn’t. My synapses hadn’t made any connection at this point. I think he thinks we told his kid to shut up.

“K”

That was it. He said “K” and it was over. He went back to his angry life. Presumably never knowing how good kettle cooked sweet and salty popcorn from Bed Bath & Beyond truly is.

We drove away lit up. Cheryl had seen the same guy inside, arguing with one of the nice ladies at the store. He’s obviously having a bad day. His kid was probably throwing a tantrum and he was projecting. That’s fine I guess. I don’t know why this ogre is going around starting fights with everybody, nor do I care. You get one chance, and he blew his. Did he have to curse at a stranger in front of his kids? Maybe. Maybe it’s what gets him to sleep at night. Being an insomniac, I know the importance of falling asleep. If you find a way, you take it.

In hindsight, there are several things I wish I had said or done. My snotty demeanor was immature enough, but I wish I was, you know… hard. I regret not going further. Given the opportunity again, I would respond with something different. Maybe one of the following:

“Apology?”
“No but have you seen the new Calphalon skillets?”
“I think your wife did.”
“Yes.”
“We don’t tell kids to shut up. We just shake ‘em.” -Cheryl
“Who are you calling an asshole devil man?”
“Relax. You’ll live longer.” -Arnold Schwartzenegger
“No, but this tire iron did.”

Did I miss any?

Hope that guy is sleeping comfortably.

Mad Men

By: Greg

07-09-2008

Blog

It’s Sunday. And that means Mad Men day. If you haven’t seen this show yet, light up a cigarette (even if you don’t smoke), surf on over to Netflix, and rent season one. Stop reading right now and do it. I promise it will enrich your life. This show is outstanding. From the moment the opening credits roll, you know you are in for a treat. Ok read on.

It comes from Matthew Weiner, who was a writer and producer on The Sopranos… and it shows. They’ve taken The Sopranos formula and applied it to the advertising industry in the 60′s. In a Pyrex mixing bowl; add terrific acting, attentive production design, and complex storytelling. Stir and bake at 450º for an hour. Ice with wonderful character development. Top with some stunning mis-en-scene. Present to friends. The writing is probably the best on TV right now.

Not surprisingly, each episode feels like a Sopranos episode. The use of music is the biggest give away, but there are others. It can be argued that each character has a doppleganger to someone on The Sopranos. Don is a bit more mysterious than Tony. Though Mad Men is not as overtly humorous as The Sopranos, the show contains subtle eye-wink humor throughout. All good drama should be this way. Like The Sopranos, it’s about characters. They spend time on little things. Each episode is more of a psychological analysis than anything else. Don’t expect to be blown away by shocking revelations every Sunday. Just enjoy the arresting ride. Mad Men has deservedly received massive critical acclaim, and for once everyone is dead on. You will get hooked after the first episode.

Set in 1960′s Manhattan, people smoke and drink non-stop. In fact the smoking is so rampant that you tend to have a sore throat after watching. The room you’re in becomes musty. I’m not kidding. That’s not exactly something that may get you interested, but it demonstrates the show’s power.

Women hold an interesting position within the show’s universe. They are generally seen as objects within the office and usually treated poorly by their husbands. Assuming the writers have done their history homework, it seems like ladies of the day were somewhat comfortable with this situation. Certainly a different time. Luckily, our heroine Peggy is paving roads. In fact, I believe this show is a much about women as it is about Mad Men.

In an informal survey (basically me staring at girls) I’ve decided that this show has helped bring back the 60′s look. I have notice more and more women are covering up and dressing like the women on this show. The torpedo bra being a notable exception. When you are influencing culture on that level, you know you’ve got something special on your hands. And it’s hot ladies.

Season Two: Sundays @ 10 on AMC. Due check it out.

John, The Apple Guy

By: Greg

11-06-2008

Blog

Well it’s another conference for Apple (WWDC) and that means a new bunch of arousing goodies for the Apple cult to feast on. With these, come online guided tours of new wares the company will peddle. And each tour is guided by…. John. John is the non-threatening, salt and pepper haired, bespectacled Baby Boomer who supposedly works at an Apple retail store and dresses just like Jobsy. Every line and hand gesture perfectly rehearsed. John, is a robot we can look up to.

There’s just something that rubs me the wrong way about ‘ol John. Maybe it’s the fact that he tries so hard to be just like “one of us”. Or it might be his distracting use of hands. He just feels like an anthropomorphic manifestation of the Apple marketing department. I’m not buying it. Sure the guy gets the job done. The message across. But… “do we have to put up with this? I mean, can’t we get a better actor? I know it’s a small part, but I think we can do better than this.”

Check out John in action.

Old Woman Names

By: Greg

20-04-2008

Blog

Where one might see boredom, I see observation. For absolutely no reason I started listing women’s names that you never see any more. I’d like to know what made these names go out of favor. Some of these are really pretty. What’s wrong with Eleanor? It’s a good name. Pretty much any name that featured prominently in a 50′s play is no longer used today.

Feel free to add to the list. Or tell me if I’m completely wrong.

Josephine
Eleanor
Blanche
Eunice
Muriel
Dorothy
Abigael
Ethel
Esther

Dirt-bag-alina

By: Greg

01-04-2008

Movies, Vodcast

This one I don’t get. I could understand 2girls1cup. I could understand the Star Wars kid. But this is one internet sensation I’m missing. Apparently, Delta Air Lines produced a new in-flight safety video with the intention of making it more interesting to look at. Achieved by throwing in higher production values, a touch of comedy, and some sex appeal. The general thinking that people zone out during this part of the flight and if they actually pay attention to this video, they may act appropriately when the time comes. So throw sparkly things at them! ooohhhhh ahhhhhh. Shiny.

Well they were so proud of their work that they decided to post the thing on YouTube for all the world to see. And the video took off. Got something like half a million views in a few days. The nice looking lady who appears in the video has been on a number of morning shows (and Ellen!) Dubbed Deltalina, a portmanteau of Delta and Angelina Jolie, (people say she looks like our favorite goodwill ambassador) has become something of a celebrity. Katherine Lee is her real name and she’s an actual flight attendant for Delta. That’s all well and good for her. I’m sure she takes her job very seriously and deserves the 15 minutes.

But what I don’t get is why this thing became a… thing. There is near zero comedy and little to no sex appeal. I don’t find Katherine Lee all that attractive actually. She’s got some odd looking cheek bones. She’s not ugly by any stretch. But she’s not entering Kardashian territory. Did I just kill my credibility? She does that one famous little finger wag. One little finger wag and you’ve got an internet phenom? Really. It’s JUST a safety video. Is all the hoopla because of those cool rack focuses? Watch it. I swear. There’s nothing to it. Seriously. Go on. Go ahead.

Looking to capitalize on any popular meme I can, I’ve decided to make my own safety video in response. I assure you, after watching mine, you’ll deplane that plane faster than petrification. Mine has no comedy or sex appeal either. But what it does have are lots and lots of sound FX! Zooooom!